NYLON’s Booster Gift Guide 2021: Your “Friendly” Internet Troll

Also known as, the keyboard warrior. If there’s ever someone who seriously needs to chill out, it’s them. You’ll find them lurking around the Internet and popping up at the most random moments — well, not entirely random. They’re usually gathered about the hot spots of Internet controversy, the online water cooler talk at ST’s comment section perhaps, and seemingly everywhere since they do take umbrage with every small affront. Instead of getting, in turn, affronted by their insensitive remarks, be the bigger person and offer the proverbial olive branch — any one of these nice (and slightly passive-aggressive) gifts will do.

LG PURICARE WEARABLE AIR PURIFIER
— $249, available at Shopee.

Put a fan on your friend’s face with this wearable air purifier. It incorporates two H13 HEPA filters — the same as those found in home purifiers — and it’s driven by a small, light motor. There’s also VoiceON technology, which employs a microphone and a built-in speaker, so if your friend forgets to turn it on, you can’t really hear them. Perfect. 

CRICUT MAKER 3
— $650, available at Lazada, Harvey Norman, POPULAR Bookstores, Spotlight and NomadX.

What your keyboard warrior friends need is a hobby — a good one to keep them occupied. The Cricut Maker 3 is the ultimate cutting machine that will keep anyone busy for days and even months on end. Your friend can start a sticker business, print t-shirts (you’ll need the Easypress for this), or create bags with fabric cut-outs from the Cricut. For the less crafty, there are ready-made projects to start with from the Cricut Design Space app, and it’s pretty easy to use. Check out our full review of the previous version of the Maker here.

“F*CK OFF, I’M COLORING!’ ADULT COLOURING BOOK
— $17.81, available at bookdepository.com.

Speaking of arts & crafts, this is just the thing for their anxiety-ridden soul — that is, 30 pages of filthy swear words they can colour in for instant stress relief. Maybe they’ll see the humour in this, or maybe they won’t. Either way, they’ll take it out on the colour pencils, not hapless strangers.

ZOUK DJ MASTERCLASS
— $49 for a DJ trial class (price valid till 31 Dec 2021). Book your course here.

Here’s another thing to occupy your friend’s time — sign them up for DJ masterclasses with Zouk’s elite resident DJs. Your friend will get to hang out with Jeremy Boon, Hong, Ghetto and Nash D, and perhaps become a better person by association. 

HENDRICK’S GIN MARTINI
— $88, available at Nutmeg & Clove.

Who has time to mix a martini when they’re busy trolling the Internet? This bottled cocktail is Hendrick’s first ready-to-drink product, and is available in limited quantities. You can serve it chilled from the fridge, shaken with ice, or poured over ice. 

T2 TEA ‘A YEAR IN TEA’ COLLECTION
— $120, available at t2tea.com.

This is the perfect gift for a proper year-end review, considering that they’d love to look back on all 12 months of spilled tea in 2021. Well, now they get to do so sipping on a variety of T2’s exquisite blends, houses in 12 mini tins.

KINDRED TEAS TALL GLASS TEAPOT + TEA TIN
— $40.85, available at kindredteas.com.

Clearly we’re not over the tea puns here, but we can imagine how Kindred Teas’ blooming blends may be quite calming to look at. Handmade by skilled Chinese tea artisans, the blooming tea slowly unfurls into a beautiful bouquet, all the better to admire in a glass teapot.

INTELLECT APP
— download here, offers in-app purchases. 

Feel like they’ve got issues? Short of engaging a professional therapist, maybe they’d benefit from a wellness app that’ll set them on a path towards better emotional management. Locally-made app Intellect is based on cognitive behavioural therapy and has 4 to 6-week programmes that simulate how you would work with a therapist, breaking down common issues around procrastination, decision-making, and more. See more similar apps here.

LOFREE EH112S MILK TEA MECHANICAL KEYBOARD
— $129, available at shopee.sg.

If all forms of intervention don’t seem to work, at least they’ll have a beautiful-looking mechanical keyboard that’s less likely to wear out.